The Fuck Ups: Cast of Characters

A partial cast of characters

This is mostly in order of appearance. This page will be updated from time to time as more installments are released, so if you get confused, check back.

Our Gang*
The Fuck Ups (1) - New Years EveThese are some of the kids I hung out with—mostly in Dave Rover’s basement… We were almost all in the “College Prep” track. Good luck with that.
*Yes, we were a gang. No we weren’t gangbangers or criminals or troublemakers (mostly). We were, as the dictionary says, “a group of people, especially young people, who regularly associate together.”

  • Adam Siegal, my cousin. A nice kid, quiet, peace maker. Straight As. Studies the martial art Aikido.
  • Dave Rover. Mostly called “Rover.” Super Genius. Straight As, except in English.
  • Helen Beagle. Yes, she’s disabled, but she drives a cool wheelchair and most of the time we don’t notice. Also Straight As.
  • Charles “Fat Charlie” Johnson. One of my best friends. An awesome human being. Great at every kind of sport, but not competitive.
  • Sean Chang. He moved to Groston from Fectville. We know he’s got money, but we try not to hold it against him.
  • Jesus Ramirez. Another really nice guy.
  • The Narrator. Me. Somewhat reliable.


    • Adam’s Mom, Dorothy Davis. My Aunt Dot.
    • Adam’s Step Dad, Paul Davis. Retired Navy. Runs A1 Security and Alarm
    • Adam’s Dad, Robert Siegal. He died a long time ago. I barely remember him.
    • Adam’s Aikido Teacher, Sensei Joey Legs. A reformed burnout. (Technically he’s not family, but Adam thought of him as a third father.)